Limiting the Demands of Our Kids – Fascination for Other Kids’ Toys & Belongings
The commonest of all the problems is most of the kids are easily fascinated by the toys and belongings of other kids resulting in demand for the same thing from their parents.
Now, this happens so frequently that it becomes very difficult for parents to fulfill all their every-day demands. And it is more difficult to deal with the kids in the age group of 3-5 years.
They live in such a self-centered world that they do what they want to do and for that, they can create all sorts of nuisance anytime, anywhere ultimately forcing the parent to get the things done.
How can you get this matter resolved? Your child is not ready to listen to you till you get him what he wants. Threatening, nagging, punishing will worsen the situation. So there is no scope for that. Bribing him for some other thing leads to the rise of other problems.
He may listen to you for some time but he comes back to his point that he wants the same thing. So this is also not going to work. But something needs to be done because fulfilling one demand will definitely give rise to another demand and this will continue. But how to limit their demand?
I also faced this situation when my 4year old daughter demanded a toy microwave oven that she had seen at one of her friend’s place. The toy was imported and gifted to her friend by his relatives. So we knew that this specific toy will not be easily available in the shops.
My daughter had stopped eating her food properly. To pacify her, we also tried to look for it in a few shops but in vain. She was not ready to accept other toys. I knew at that moment that we were in trouble.
I was thinking of various solutions to this problem. Her stubbornness grew, making it difficult for us to deal with the situation. Then suddenly I asked her “how about making a microwave oven at home?”
She raised her face to look at me attentively, she stopped misbehaving at once and asked me curiously “is it possible mom? How can we do it? Will it look like the one I have seen?”
Instantly, I replied, “it will be better than that because you are going to make it.” I saw the excitement on her face. So without disturbing the flow I thought of moving on. I was now sure that something has clicked and it is going to be a hit.
I asked her to get an empty shoebox which was in the shoe rack, and then we picked up some glittering wrappers, scissor, fevicol, tape, sketch pens, and a few decorative items.
I told her that we will work on it together. We wrapped the shoebox with a beautiful paper and cut out a door in the front and then made all sorts of buttons on one side and decorated the oven while involving her completely.
The end result was really good. It was a very good effort on our part. I saw my daughter’s face, she was so happy that she had made a microwave oven herself. She called all her friends and showed a homemade oven to everyone. The idea worked.
She stopped demanding for the toy microwave! I took a sigh of relief. The homemade oven became very dear to her. She happily played with it and treasured it as she had made it herself. She felt very proud of what she had achieved.
From then on, I tried to find out every solution at home for her fascinations before hunting for it in the market. Of course, I will not talk about the large objects that she demanded such as a cycle as we cannot make at home but I think we can limit the smaller ones.
Firstly, it is not a costly affair and secondly, things can be made out of cheap, readily available materials at home. You just need to be creative and apply your brain and it can do wonders. So we made wonderful things like:
- camera out of a soap box
- goggles out of paper and cardboard
- purse out of newspaper
- wristwatch with cardboard and ribbons
- Christmas tree with disposable glass, paper and other decorative items
- Painted a t-shirt with her favourite cartoon character on it with fabric colours etc.
She demanded these things and we made them at home involving her. She started enjoying the idea. It was fun for her. The whole idea satiated her demands and my problem was also solved peacefully.
Further, I realized that this idea helped me in various ways. As a parent:
- I learned how to handle such situations peacefully, patiently and calmly without losing temper,
- It brought out my creative side also,
- It is fun playing and doing something creative with kids.
- It made me feel lighter in the day’s hectic schedule,
- I developed a special bonding with my kid.
For the development of child this idea helped me in:
- Limiting her demands,
- Proper utilization of time,
- Inculcating creative interest in her and bringing out her creativity.
- Even kids apply their mind and give ideas which should be encouraged.
- This helps in the development of cognitive and thinking skills of the kids,
- learning touch, feel and how to use different things safely under the guidance of some elder person. It helps in improving the fine motor skills of the child,
- Channelizing her energy into positive things and doing something productive and constructive,
- Encourages group activity
Encourages a feeling of importance as she gets proper attention during that time which further boosts her self-confidence and development that she can do it,
This enthusiasm keeps her happy which positively affects other things.
Her happiness and smile on her face keep me going when she says “mamma lets do it?”
Contributed By: Richa Agarwal, a housewife, a post-graduate in mass communication and journalism & has a passion for writing. [email protected]
Want to share your good parenting tips or personal experience about how you guided your kids? Email us [email protected]